Search Results for: blog slow down grandma

Slow Down for the Holidays

I’m always trying to look on the bright side, even when it comes to being divorced. I never imaged that I would be a single mother but I have to admit that I’ve grown in to it and I’m actually enjoying it, most of the time. One of the joys of being divorced is not having to make two families happy for the holidays. I remember the days of going to my parents house and then going to his families for dinner later. All this really meant was that we ate way too much and everyone was cranky, including Hailey. … Continue reading →

Tips for Slimming Down Post-Baby

Just because it’s been a year since you gave birth doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve returned to your pre-baby body. After all, giving birth is only the beginning of life after baby. There are feedings to worry about, diapers, laundry, and new sleep schedules. So, when are you supposed to find time to workout? Experts suggest easing back into your fitness routine after giving birth. In fact, leading obstetricians advocate a gradual approach to weight loss as opposed to crash dieting and exercising like a fiend to shed unwanted baby weight. Doctors say, typically it should take between 9 to 12 … Continue reading →

Adoption Blog Month in Review, April 2007: Part Two

Please see Part One of this blog for updates on adoption blog writers and highlights from late March and early April. In Feeling Different from Family? I muse on finding the right balance between acknowledging our daughters’ different ethnicity and heritage and overemphasizing them. My daughter puts my fears at least temporarily at rest with this zinger—check it out. In How Do You Introduce Yourself to Your Own Child? -Part One: Prepare Them I talk about things adoptive parents can do, even from a distance, to prepare their child for the transition, such as sending photos, tapes, and even a … Continue reading →

Slow Down, Grandma

If you are lucky, your parents and extended family will be almost as eager to greet the new family member as you are. But for children who have lost their connection to a trusted caregiver, they should have a period of time to adjust to their new parents, and have their new parents meet all their needs, before adjusting to other people in their lives. We chose not to have a big arrival party at the airport, just my father. My father greeted us first, then welcomed my daughter in a soft voice and did not try to touch her. … Continue reading →

Start Your Holiday Shopping Now

Confession time: I am terrible when it comes to Christmas shopping. It’s not uncommon for me to still be wrapping presents on Christmas morning while everyone waits downstairs for me to “get dressed.” I don’t like pushing through crowds, I don’t like the pressure of finding the perfect gift, I don’t like the stress of spending when I don’t have that much to spend, and I always let time get away from me. Sometimes it will be a week before Christmas before I realize I only have a week to get everything together, and by that time my schedule is … Continue reading →

Caring For Yourself When You Have a New Baby

I was notoriously unprepared for our daughter’s arrival. Now, I am normally extremely organized. I have a calendar that looks like a small army of ants ran across it and spread little annotated footprints everywhere. However, before my daughter was born, we did the usual: bought a new house, moved into my parents’ place, renovated our new home extensively, and got a chronic illness. Ok, perhaps the chronic illness part is unusual, but the rest seems to be part of the chaos of nesting. So do what I wish I’d done, not what I did. Let me be the bad … Continue reading →

Thoughts of Another Adoptive Mother, Continued

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My last two blogs have been a review of Jana Wolff’s memoir Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother and my reflections on my experiences and their similarities and differences with Wolff’s.Those reflections are continued here. I related to Wolff’s descriptions of her family—how happy they were and eager to include this new grandchild, but still recognizing something different. “Being adopted and being of color changed the way this baby was held and welcomed by his new extended family,” Wolff declares. “Ari was neither the first grandchild nor the first grandson, but he was touched with the gingerness of first-timers,” Wolff … Continue reading →

Chocolate Banana Cream Pie

Not all birthdays are celebrated with cake. Just ask my mom. She hasn’t commemorated her birthday with cake for as long as I’ve been alive. Rather, on her special day she requests Banana Cream Pie… and not just any Banana Cream Pie. Each fall my mom celebrates another year on earth with at least two slices of Mile-High Banana Cream Pie with an Oreo Cookie crust. Yes, it’s as decadent as it sounds. In honor of my mom’s upcoming birthday I thought I would share the recipe for her special pie. I’d love to say that it is an ancient … Continue reading →

Preparing for a Family Reunion

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Many adoptees report feeling part of their immediate families, but never quite feeling like “part of the gang” at extended family gatherings. Especially when these reunions are of people who live far from each other and don’t know each other that well, much of the talk may center on who looks like who, on memories of someone your child never met, on family history and ethnic traditions which your child may be conscious of not being a part of. Even if your child is used to looking different from you and your spouse, being the only brown child in a … Continue reading →

Considerations in Adopting When You Already Have Children: Travel, Part Two

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In deciding whether to take your children with you, consider the safety of the place to which you are traveling and the availability of aid in any emergency that may occur. Friends of mine initially planned to take their daughters on their trip to pick up their son. This was a region that required one parent to make an initial visit several weeks before both parents traveled for the actual adoption. When the father made the initial visit he was startled at the absolute lack of adequate medical facilities in the remote region and decided he was not at all … Continue reading →